The First Ode to And
So, Tom the Invincible responded to our last letter “Ode to And” – with:
“To follow this up, worth pointing out in future newsletters, that to avoid making an inadvertent inflammatory statement that a full stop works well also (rather than but) as in:
John, you are a great dentist. I wonder if…… as opposed to John you are a great dentist, but…. (no you’re not)
Also how and what works well too, as in:
blah blah, how do you think we could……, or
blah blah, what might be some ways we could……”
Nice one, thank you, Tom the Invincible.
Tom the Invincible and The Grover (David Grove) would ‘walk hand in hand’ (as do I!) in their exquisite mastery of elegant, clean, respectful communications skills.
How and What are two of David’s major Clean Language questions.
Recently I received an e mail with a question I’ve been asked loads of times, which is: “What if I can’t be hypnotised?” (Full stop here!!)
I’ll talk with you about this question soon, because I’m ‘on a roll’ now, buzzing with thoughts about Tom the Invincible’s point about ‘how’ and ‘what’.
Clean Language creates a successful environment for you to achieve triumphant change. Not quick fixes that deconstruct come next month! Everlasting solid and triumphant change.
Here is an overview of the process of change.
You are in a space with a problem state. The problem is in the space where you are. In a second space there is your Goal, what ever your goal may be, and we all of us have a goal or goals, which are in another space from where you are.
In between your problem space and your goal space, is another space – for you to journey into.
OK – to make clearer sense of this, simply take a piece of paper and write down your goal – and I am today talking about a recognised psychological or emotional goal rather than the:
I want a date with my super hero!!
I want to own an Aston Martin!!
(Though these types of goals are in a true essence driven by our psychology and our emotions!)
To help you to write your goal, answer the question:
“And – what do I want to have happen?” (This non ordinary question invites a non ordinary response)
When you have written your answer on your paper you are in a space that we will call A – your goal in a space that we will call B and there is a space between you and your goal we will call C. In the C space is your journey to your discovery of solutions and resolutions to your problem in the A space.
The C space will have loads of What and How questions filling it.
Here is a simple example, and if you’d like more in depth examples just ask me.
Q: And what do I want to have happen?
A: I want to be slim and regain my figure and my health.
Q: And – what could be the first thing that can happen so that I can be slim and regain my figure and my health?
A: I need the confidence in myself so that I will know I can do it
Q: And when I need the confidence in myself so that I will know I can do it – how can I have the confidence……
A: I really need to stop putting myself down
Q: And what could be the first thing that can happen so that I can stop putting myself down……
I promise you it will so valuable for you to journey into your C space with your own what and how questions.
Thanks again to Tom the Invincible…….
Thinking of you warmly,
Cures that Endure
To ensure you receive my lettters please add me to your safe sender or contacts list: firstname.lastname@example.org
Enjoy my letters? Please feel free to Forward to a friend
My personal and private e mail: email@example.com