This kind of self empowering Work to permanently resolve a problem state – does take time. It’s not as hard and does not take as long as you might think!
Like any job or task we need and want to do, we so often procrastinate – hoping perhaps it will get done all by itself without our time & attention! But, it doesn’t go away, our ‘Fairy Godmother’ didn’t sort it, it keeps on niggling away at us to – do something!
Then: so many times – when we finally ‘get down to it’ and sort it, we announce in a pleased & surprised voice:– ‘Well: that wasn’t that hard – it didn’t actually take that long at all – wish I’d done it ‘ages’ ago!’
Maybe as you’ve been reading my letters you’ve simply been interested in the Strategies, or maybe you have made a start toward achieving your Goal. But if you haven’t made a start and feel you want to and you’ve missed out on some of my letters about this process, please catch up with them here on our web site.
The allegory that my Dear friend Sue said the other week, about a number of Therapies ‘out there’ are like: “Putting roses on a heap of dog pooh on the floor of your home…. the pooh’s still there!” (Sue didn’t actually use the word pooh!) Well, I have had another thought about her allegory:
It’s like the problems we deal with, the; I’m nervous, fearful, worrying, anxious, not sleeping, can’t say ‘No!’….. we think isn’t as bad as a pile of dog pooh on the floor of our home.
It’s more like a stain – we cover with a rug and we learn all kinds of coping ways to walk around the rug! We are all such great copers. (Spell check has just informed me there’s no such word as ‘copers’!)
Coping with things in life, in itself, is a strength.
Nevertheless we have a ‘stain’ on the floor of our ‘home’, (by ‘home’ I mean our ‘inner mind’).
And none of us, I’m certain, will tolerate for long covering up a ‘stain’ on the floor of our house. We’d get to work on ‘cleaning it up’ pretty quickly, maybe once we’ve done some research on the right cleansing product for the stain. And, if we realised that that ‘mess’ was dog pooh – we’d be onto right away, today, cleaning!
So the last thing we considered in your Quest to move from a problem state – to your Goal state is the resolving of the “Yeah But(s)…” by first differentiating them into 2 lists:
‘Invalidating self beliefs’ & ‘Protective mechanisms’
Today let’s begin with deconstructing: Invalidating self beliefs.
Because they’re garbage.
They block you from being full on successful in your Quest.
So: take each one from your list & ask this Question:
Where did that come from?
Your answers will ensure that you fully & congruently want rid of that – it can go something like this: “This invalidating self belief came from – That important adult, when I was a teenager, they kept telling me I’d always be a failure………Hang on a minute they were wrong!”
We can’t usually polarize long standing negative beliefs by thinking, (using this example): “I am a success!” you’ll get a pretty instant: “Yeah But – you failed in this & you failed in that…..”
So start with: “I am a success at……” (whatever resonates with you, simple stuff – like ‘I am a success at smiling!’ ‘I am a success at making soup!’)
What you’re doing is building up a new positive self belief system that will celebrate who you are & who you were born to be. This is my wish for you.
There is a fast track way to deconstruct negative invalidating self beliefs – we’ll have a look at that one next week.
I’ve spent 20 odd years in developing my comprehensive, thorough, mind-emotional ‘Cleansing’ product.
You’ll find Gift sample tracks to try on my You Tube channel. Have a try. They each last about 20 minutes.
Each unique sample is one of the 15 tracks from each of the different Courses of Rapha Therapy Mind Cleansing Systems I have recorded to cure problems such as: Lack of Self Esteem – Be the Right Weight – Resolve Insomnia – Fix a Phobia – Kick Annoying Habits – Solutions to Stress – Resolve Nervous Stomach – Have Harmonious Relationships, and more.
Rapha Therapy System – ‘Cures that Endure’