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Archive for May, 2011

How Yoga Can Improve Your Self Confidence

Monday, May 23rd, 2011
Hatha Yoga is good for the soul

Try Hatha Yoga for inner peace and outer calm.

In the early 1980’s I was very fortunate to study Hatha Yoga with a man who had established ‘The Centre for Human Communication’ in England. This gentleman had spent many years in India learning not only Hatha Yoga but also studying Sanskrit, which I loved. I was able, through his teaching of Sanskrit, to gain an understanding of the meaning of the language of yoga. It was then that I began to consider the connection between Yoga, particularly Hatha Yoga, and self confidence.
Along with my studies and practice of hypnotherapy and psychotherapy and the psychology of Hatha Yoga I have developed my remarkable course available as a set of 5 CD’s or as MP3 download from my web site; Gain Self Confidence.
This course, as are all my other courses, is in depth and detailed sufficient to bring about lasting Self Confidence for you.
To achieve this depth and for you to get resolution, you will need to allow 30 minutes a day for 40 days.
Before we go any further we need to remind ourselves of the meaning of the Sanskrit words yoga and Hatha, since this will enable us to begin to learn about the absolute and inspiring connection with self confidence, and our infinite potential.
Yoga means oneness, unity, perfection. And Hatha, meaning the realm of duality, contains two words ha and tha. In Sanskrit ha – is the sun, the noumenal, and tha – is the moon, the phenomenal.
Unity means yoga, and yoga means unity.
The connection between Yoga and self confidence
If like many others, you lack self confidence, then this normally means that there is a lack of unity within yourself that causes the dissension and disharmony with the world around you. Unity needs to be experienced within our self in order to experience yoga, or unity with the world around you.
The question for me therefore from all those years ago was…
“How does our lack of confidence or lack of belief come about and how can we grow to a state of unity, yoga, from a state of duality, Hatha?”
Jung teachings state that the anima (the feminine component, or ha in both males and females) and animus (the masculine component, tha, also in both males and females) act as guides to the unconscious unified self, (yoga) and that forming an awareness and a connection with the anima and animus is one of the most rewarding steps in psychological growth.
This means that the lack of unity between our anima and animus fundamentally contributes to our lack of self confidence – let me give you some examples:
Our animus states: I want to apply for that job; I want to give that performance. Our anima hides with: ‘Oh, I can’t, I can’t….’
Our anima will state: I will make that speech, I will give that presentation. Our animus declares ‘No way….’
Now we are stuck, we have an inner turmoil, which will prevent us from taking our desired action. We feel angry at our failure, or we feel withdrawn so metaphorically speaking we put a bag over our heads, never to be seen again. We feel frightened or anxious and stagnate in the vicious cycle of an inner battle. We believe we are a failure as we have an inner communication breakdown which literally blocks us from taking right action. We have an inner: ‘I want’ battling with an: ‘I can’t’.
So, you may be wondering, “What, has this to do with self confidence?”
The dictionary informs us that confidence is: belief in our abilities.
To achieve complete and inner harmonious confidence about any ability, we need one hundred percent belief in our self. Practically speaking how can we change the: ‘I want – but I can’t’ and bring about inner belief, certainty, harmony and therefore confidence?
In terms of our Hatha Yoga practice we can consider and ponder upon the fact that much of Hatha Yoga practice is designed to free our inner communication blocks.
Hatha yoga is the method by which we can transcend the opposites of our inner life and achieve oneness, no more push, pull, I want, I can’t turmoil. This will mean unity of our mind and therefore a perfect stability of our action. Hatha yoga practices and discipline our Asana’s, (postures and exercises) are to remove communication blocks, to harmonise our personality and to bring about a stillness and certainty of our mind. That being said, we will not gain the self confidence we need in certain aspects of our life through our practice of Asana’s. However, yoga will help you to balance and unify the energies of the mind and remove your communication blocks.
Now you know how to remove your communication blocks. My next blog will look at how my strategies on the Gain Confidence and Self Esteem course will help you clarify your self confidence goal, identify positive reasons to achieve you goal which will help to get you motivated, and thirdly believe that you will succeed.

Sally

sally@sally-stubbs.com  please feel free to contact me direct

Self Confidence – Recipe for Success

Wednesday, May 18th, 2011

Self Confidence – recipe for success
Successful people ooze self confidence; this probably explains why so much psychological research has been done to identify what it is that all successful people have in common. And by successful, the research ranged from someone wanting to be successful in their home life, family, health, relationships, or creative work, or community work, or to the massive corporate businesses such as Bill Gates Microsoft, Marc Allen New World Library, and Jack Canfield Chicken Soup for the Soul.
I’m going to use this blog to let you into their secret, and help you to apply these positive strategies to your own situation so that you can successfully grow your own unique self confidence.
Here goes… in order to successfully grow your own confidence you need to do three things:
Number 1 – know what you want, this means that you need to set yourself a comprehensive goal.
You may have three goals or a ‘dozen’ goals, you may feel overwhelmed by the number of goals that you want to achieve. You need to take one goal at a time, perhaps a small one to begin with. Write it down; continue to refine your goal as you go along.
Number 2 – know your reasons or purposes to succeed as you need to know this in order to remain fully motivated.
You need to really know your purposes since this will help you to focus on your motivation for achieving your goal. As all behaviour has a purpose, behaviour does not have meaning as such, behaviour has purpose, knowing your own unique purposes to gain self confidence, will really ‘spring board’ you towards achieving your goal successfully.
Number 3 – you must believe that you will succeed.
Once you have these three things you will then have the self confidence to accomplish what you want.
You will need to work to change your negative beliefs. Our beliefs are driving a massive part of our behaviour. If we believe we can, we can. If we believe we can’t, we can’t.

Here are some practical tips on how to accomplish these tasks and use them to improve your self confidence.

Setting your goal
Always write your goal in the positive. Let’s take the example of going for a job interview, to illustrate what I mean, write something like: I will be confidently calm and strong and feel inner harmony when I am communicating with interviewers’ rather than; ‘I won’t be nervous and tongue tied when I am communicating’ Why? Because, simplistically our amazing brain will respond to an instruction to be calm, strong, and have inner harmony. Rather than responding to an instruction to not be nervous and tongue tied.
Our brain is amazing, but it will see and hear, ‘be nervous and tongue tied’. Just as you have done as you have been reading this!
Once you have decided what your goal is you need to speak your goal, out loud, several times. As you speak, the vitally important thing for you to do is to be very aware of any inner objections, (which will be negative beliefs,) either in your feelings or your thoughts. An objection could be something like a knotted stomach, or a negative ‘I can’t do that…’ thought.

Know your purpose
So, this is about you getting really focused and motivated, with loads of energy to move you onwards to successfully achieve your goal. As I’ve said, deeply knowing your own purposes will assist your motivation.
You may be thinking that your purposes to gain self confidence are obvious? No they aren’t, your purposes will contain nuances and fine details unique to you.
So, let us consider my example of having the confidence to go for that job interview. Your goal is to be confidently calm and strong and feel inner harmony when you’re communicating with interviewers.
So, you need to then ask yourself: What is my purpose in wanting to be confidently calm and strong and feel inner harmony when I’m communicating with interviewers?
My example answer: This will really help me in my career.
Keep asking, to really get to your depth of purpose: What is my purpose in really wanting to get on with my career?
Answer: My family and friends will be proud of me.
I urge you to keep on asking the same question, and the same for each of your purposes, until you maybe get a ‘Ting’ moment, which gives you a deeper understanding of your purposes than you’d thought of before. In my simple example, the ‘Ting’ moment is like this: ‘Wow, I hadn’t realised that I want my family and friends to feel proud of me!’
I urge you to make notes about your purposes.
This is a very simplistic example, I so hope it lets you realise the depths and importance of really knowing your own purposes.
Believe in yourself
The problem with this is that many of our beliefs are unconscious, that is we do not consciously know we have them. How can you first know, and then deconstruct your unconscious negative beliefs, specifically about achieving your goal?
Seriously, achieving this can be tricky on your own; it can be like ‘pulling yourself up by your own boot laces’. You may want to consider my course on gaining self confidence, which is assisting you to work comfortably with your own unconscious beliefs, an amazing thing to do. Unconscious belief systems can be tricky because the ‘language’ is of the unconscious.
Take your time to write notes by asking questions of all the objections. Ask: Where does that objection come from? As you learn the history of the negative beliefs, you will be able to deconstruct them.
Along with my studies and practice of hypnotherapy and psychotherapy I have developed my remarkable course available as a set of 5 CD’s or as MP3 download from my web site; Gain Self Confidence.
This course, as do all my other courses, covers in depth and detail all of these points sufficient to bring about lasting Self Confidence for you.
To achieve this depth and for you to get resolution, you will need to allow 30 minutes a day for 40 days.
I wish you every success and an inner experience of unity, harmony and peace. I know you can

Sally