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Archive for March, 2014

Success at Smiling …………

Monday, March 31st, 2014
Sally Stubbs

Sally Stubbs

This kind of self empowering Work to permanently resolve a problem state – does take time. It’s not as hard and does not take as long as you might think!
Like any job or task we need and want to do, we so often procrastinate – hoping perhaps it will get done all by itself without our time & attention! But, it doesn’t go away, our ‘Fairy Godmother’ didn’t sort it, it keeps on niggling away at us to – do something!
Then: so many times – when we finally ‘get down to it’ and sort it, we announce in a pleased & surprised voice:– ‘Well: that wasn’t that hard – it didn’t actually take that long at all – wish I’d done it ‘ages’ ago!’
Maybe as you’ve been reading my letters you’ve simply been interested in the Strategies, or maybe you have made a start toward achieving your Goal. But if you haven’t made a start and feel you want to and you’ve missed out on some of my letters about this process, please catch up with them here on our web site.
The allegory that my Dear friend Sue said the other week, about a number of Therapies ‘out there’ are like: “Putting roses on a heap of dog pooh on the floor of your home…. the pooh’s still there!” (Sue didn’t actually use the word pooh!) Well, I have had another thought about her allegory:
It’s like the problems we deal with, the; I’m nervous, fearful, worrying, anxious, not sleeping, can’t say ‘No!’….. we think isn’t as bad as a pile of dog pooh on the floor of our home.
It’s more like a stain – we cover with a rug and we learn all kinds of coping ways to walk around the rug! We are all such great copers. (Spell check has just informed me there’s no such word as ‘copers’!)
Coping with things in life, in itself, is a strength.
Nevertheless we have a ‘stain’ on the floor of our ‘home’, (by ‘home’ I mean our ‘inner mind’).
And none of us, I’m certain, will tolerate for long covering up a ‘stain’ on the floor of our house. We’d get to work on ‘cleaning it up’ pretty quickly, maybe once we’ve done some research on the right cleansing product for the stain. And, if we realised that that ‘mess’ was dog pooh – we’d be onto right away, today, cleaning!

So the last thing we considered in your Quest to move from a problem state – to your Goal state is the resolving of the “Yeah But(s)…” by first differentiating them into 2 lists:
‘Invalidating self beliefs’ & ‘Protective mechanisms’

Today let’s begin with deconstructing: Invalidating self beliefs.
Why bother?
Because they’re garbage.
They block you from being full on successful in your Quest.

So: take each one from your list & ask this Question:
Where did that come from?
Your answers will ensure that you fully & congruently want rid of that – it can go something like this: “This invalidating self belief came from – That important adult, when I was a teenager, they kept telling me I’d always be a failure………Hang on a minute they were wrong!”

We can’t usually polarize long standing negative beliefs by thinking, (using this example): “I am a success!” you’ll get a pretty instant: “Yeah But – you failed in this & you failed in that…..”
So start with: “I am a success at……” (whatever resonates with you, simple stuff – like ‘I am a success at smiling!’ ‘I am a success at making soup!’)
What you’re doing is building up a new positive self belief system that will celebrate who you are & who you were born to be. This is my wish for you.

There is a fast track way to deconstruct negative invalidating self beliefs – we’ll have a look at that one next week.

I’ve spent 20 odd years in developing my comprehensive, thorough, mind-emotional ‘Cleansing’ product.
You’ll find Gift sample tracks to try on my You Tube channel. Have a try. They each last about 20 minutes.
Each unique sample is one of the 15 tracks from each of the different Courses of Rapha Therapy Mind Cleansing Systems I have recorded to cure problems such as: Lack of Self Esteem – Be the Right Weight – Resolve Insomnia – Fix a Phobia – Kick Annoying Habits – Solutions to Stress – Resolve Nervous Stomach – Have Harmonious Relationships, and more.

Enjoy!

Warmly
Sally
Sally Stubbs
Rapha Therapy System – ‘Cures that Endure’

www.sally-stubbs.com

I Have a Problem with Most Therapy!

Monday, March 24th, 2014
Sally Stubbs

Sally Stubbs

I am going to be really Controversial here! So, ‘Yeah’ what’s new!

And I hope that what I’m about to say – will spread like ‘a wild fire’ throughout the Internet – and provoke loads of argument. I’m ‘up & fighting’ and fully ready for the arguments!

It really, really, really upsets me – that the largest percentage of Therapies – ‘out there’ Do Not Work – to effect permanent lasting Cure of mind-emotional suffering.

It’s taken me years & years to put all this together.
Where the mind ‘blocks’ us from successfully and permanently achieving Resolution, is what most therapies ignore – ‘cover up’ – ‘plaster over the cracks’ or as a Great friend recently said to me: “It’s like planting roses on top of a pile of pooh!”
My discoveries are so meaningful, so powerful – this isn’t the ‘quick fix’ woo.woo land. This is effective & permanent – it isn’t Magic -but it does have Magical results!
We’d love the instant ‘fix’. AND – we’d love someone else to do it for us! We want the Therapists, the ger-zillion ‘self help’ books – the programmes – the courses to ‘click the fingers’ & Gerzam – ‘just like that’ – we’re Fixed! Of course we do! Wouldn’t it be lovely!

Most well meaning Therapies have ‘bought into’ this old Paradigm – Give the Control over to someone else or to something else to Fix our mind-emotional problems.

IF these Therapeutic Strategies really Worked we’d all be Happy & Fixed – decades ago. Not Lah-Lah Land Happy! – We’d still have sad days, downish days, grumpy days – then we’d move on. We would know we can choose to move on and be’ in Tense’ – that’s a good place for the Heart to visit every now & again. Or be ‘in Suspense’ – an adventurous place to be several times in the year, enjoying the tingles of adrenalin……. Or – simply be in Calm Places. Or. Spend a few hours alongside me in Bonkerdom!

And never visit ‘in Determinate’ – or be ‘in Doubt’ (about successfully achieving our Goal) ever again.

About two weeks ago we were considering this:
“We will get our selves – plenty of Outstanding Energy – & move forwards to Successfully achieving our Goal!”

So: we’ve been doing that by listing our reasons and our purposes to achieve what we want. We are now like an Olympic Athlete fired up with Outstanding Energy: on the starting blocks – to move away from our problem state and journey towards our Goal state.

Get a page of paper right now – and on the left side write the problem state: such as: I can’t say NO! – I’m stressed – I’m worried witless – I can’t sleep – I’m anxious – I’m worthless – I’m so fearful………..I get so angry I could explode…….. People don’t ‘get me’………. People hate me…………… I’m so lonely……………….. Your words – you know what the problem state is.

Then opposite on the right of your page write your Goal State. State your Goal in the positive: such as “I will say NO!” and “I will be really calm…”

You’re ready to move from your problem to your Goal – you’ve got the motivation, the Outstanding Energy from all your reasons & purposes…………

The Truth here is – it is not a straight line (across the page) Look at the line like a journey – along that line – there are dips – where our mind blocks us. These dips or blocks, or holes that we ‘fall down into’ are the “Yeah But(s)…..” that we’ve began to explore already together this year.

A ‘how’ to discover your own “Yeah But(s)……..” is for you to speak out loud – your Goal. And instantly ‘listen’ to your very next thoughts or feelings in your body – Feelings such as a churning in the stomach – a tightness in the chest – a pounding in the heart – And thoughts such as: ‘I’ve tried everything – I always fail……’

These “Yeah But(s)…..” blocks, dips or holes in your journey across ‘the page’ were originally either learnt invalidating self beliefs – or were originally learnt as an unsuccessful safe mechanism.
Example: “the pounding in my Heart – stops me from speaking my mind – As long as I stay quiet and I don’t speak up I won’t get into trouble I’ll be OK”

List all your “Yeah But(s)…..” There will be more than one or two.

Differentiate them into ‘invalidating self beliefs’ and ‘original protective mechanisms’

Each “Yeah But….” Needs individual attention.

Get going with your lists. It isn’t hard – your results and your journey will be Magical.
We’ll talk more about what to do with your dips or blocks or holes in your journey across your ‘page’ next time.

Let the Breeze Blow In – will safely guide you to discover your “Yeah But(s)….” Because one of the problems is that some of these invalidating self beliefs & protective mechanism are Unconscious – we don’t even consciously know we have them. Get in ‘the zone’ with my voice – then ignore my voice and say to your ‘self’ for the 20 minutes of my Story: “I want my Unconscious mind to comfortably tell me my “Yeah But(s)….”
Warmly

Sally
Sally Stubbs
Rapha Therapy System – Cures that Endure

sally@sally-stubbs.com

A Star Appearance………….

Monday, March 17th, 2014

Cumbrian Red Squirrel

Cumbrian Red Squirrel

I thought that you might be a wee bit bored – for a while  – of my Top Banana Tips to bring Permanent Resolution to the wearisome –   debilitating ‘Ground Hog Day’ of mind-emotional problems.
SO: Here is a link for you to my Promo  – It lasts three minutes –  that’s all! Take a look – Enjoy – the Realization of the depths of the true Redemptive Wisdom of the Unconscious mind – to Resolve our       Mind-Emotional Problems.OR – sit back for three minutes and gawp happily at the Beauty of Derwentwater – and the River Greta ‘playing her merry songs’! plus  ‘the star’ appearance of the Red Squirrel!              There’s a mighty lot to enjoy in 3 minutes. Check it out please.
I am totally filled with Respect & Gratitude to all my Clients who gave their time & effort to make my Promo.
Work with me is Private – so their willingness & even eagerness to appear – for the Purpose of helping others with problems is nothing short of Awesome.
The Work and the Strategies I did 1:1 with these wonderful people –  I have Carefully & Rigorously distilled into my RAPHA HYPNOSIS –   half an hour a day – for forty days – in the privacy of one’s own home –   Therapeutic System.
It’s taken me many years to ‘get it Right’ AND produce my Courses! So, I’m pretty proud of me!So  please ‘Click’ the link above and meet a few ex clients:
SARAH –  an inability to commit to a relationship.
LYN –       anxiety & difficulty sleeping / insomnia
TALI –     debilitating stammering.
ELAINE –  social phobia & weight problems.
SUE –       in her words: “The old spider phobia”
JONNY –  Testicular Cancer – as Jonny says: “Low in       energy, low in self esteem, fearful, low in everything really. I left the first Session to be honest feeling like I was Rocky. Energy just seemed       to come  to me from nowhere”
CLAIRE –  Hay Fever
CASSIE –  Hay Fever

.And the RED SQUIRREL – came to make a Star Appearance…………………
ENJOY…….
Warmly
Sally         Sally Stubbs            Rapha Hypnosis Therapy System – ‘Cures that Endure’

 

My personal and private e mail: sally@sally-stubbs.com

The Loss of Several Cows!

Monday, March 10th, 2014
outstanding energy

energised!

How about going for this statement:

We will get our selves – plenty of Outstanding Energy – & move forwards to Successfully achieving our Goal!
We can & we will do this – & – I’m Wondering if – You will agree with me! I can – ask this of us – can I not!

I can ask – & then together – as you will agree – with me – we can begin to Explore the how we can achieve Outstanding Energy to Successfully Achieve Our own Goal.

Yeah – the absolutely all important HOW. We can all say stuff like: I really, really, really, really want to – Fix my computer! Build an amazing house…….. Bake a delicious cake…….. Anything………… (Here’s a rare ‘but’ from me!) But – for all things that we want to ‘fix ‘we need to know how!

(I wrote a Great Book – & called it “The ‘Soul’ Fixer” – the how to fix the ‘Soul’ or ‘Spirit’ or ‘Self’ – (another ‘but’!) But – the ‘Soul’, ‘Spirit’, ‘Self’ doesn’t actually need ‘fixing’; IT didn’t get ‘broken’ – IT – (let’s say for now) ‘went into hiding’ Which is a whole other subject for us another time. Any way my Book is now called:

“FRAYED EDGES…”

So, let’s say: We really, really, really, really want to change our thoughts our feelings & our negative invalidating beliefs.

My chosen subject for nearly 40 years has been – the how to do this – to live life problem free – free to be content, happy, free to be – our self – free to support & cherish others – accept our ‘down’ – sad days – have a bit of a ‘grumpy’ day – and continue to grow in our own happiness.

We’re talking here about what I’ll call – simple symptoms’ – which to you & to others aren’t simple – they’re debilitating. They can be seriously awful – I know it – I’ve been there – such as: I can’t say NO! – I’m stressed – I’m worried witless – I can’t sleep – I’m anxious – I’m worthless – I’m so fearful……….. people don’t ‘get me’………. People hate me…………… I’m so lonely………………..

We’re not insane! Though I know the endless mind-emotional ‘Ground Hog Day’ – (same ‘damn’ thing over & over again…… same old negative unwelcome thoughts – same old stomach churning – same old feeling worthless – same old saying ‘yes’ instead of a true No……..) – can make us feel like we’re going crazy. We got ‘Frayed at our Edges’ during all kinds of experiences in life.

In the mid eighteen hundreds – the pioneers were doing their best to treat ‘mind’ problems. They developed a multiplicity of diagnoses. In the old books causes of ‘mind problems’ were divided into two main categories. The first category being called Moral; this included diagnosis such as: ‘loss of several cows’ and ‘getting over excited at the Great Exhibition!’

Valiant attempts were made to treat many of these ‘mind problems’ in buildings called Asylums – from the Latin ‘A’ meaning NO – & ‘sylum’ meaning CURE.

Places of No Cure. My Heart Aches……….

I am only interested in Cure – Permanent Cure of our: I can’t say NO! – I’m stressed – I’m worried witless – I can’t sleep – I’m anxious – I’m worthless – I’m so fearful……….. people don’t ‘get me’………. People hate me…………… I’m so lonely………………..

The How:
Maybe you have been drawing and Working with your Metaphors these past couple of weeks?
Maybe you said what most of us are prone to say: ‘Yeah – all right – when I’ve time” or “Sally’s crazy!” (Yeah – well I do revel in my respite times in Bonkerdom – I visit there most days!)

So – let’s ‘back track’ with the how:
Start by giving your Goal attention for a few minutes a day for the coming week. Write it down chew your pen – hone your Goal.

If you’ve got several Goals like: I want to sleep well – I want to feel confident – I want to say NO and mean NO! Take one Goal at a time.

Start to draft your Goal in the positive. Like this (let’s take sleep as an example); instead of stating I want to stop tossing & turning at night; I want to stop waking at 3 or 4pm most mornings – State: I want to sleep well throughout the night.

The next how:
Over the next few days – a few minutes every day, write a list of your reasons & purposes to achieve your goal.

You might reasonably be thinking, it’s obvious, I want to sleep well!
But add the why component to the mix:
• I’m drowsy through the day but don’t sleep well at night!
• I seem to just get off to sleep and my alarm goes off
• My work isn’t up to scratch because I’m tired all the time
• I want enough energy for work and fun
These are my examples, be sure to list your own specific reasons and purposes.

Reasons are mostly about logic and purposes are mostly about ‘passions’. You’ll have loads on your list once

YOU WILL START TO WRITE IT!

Here’s my gift to you with my love – Let the Breeze Blow In.
Listen to it every day for the coming days – and as you listen: once you begin to feel that you are ‘in the zone’ with my voice guiding you – ignore my voice – and focus your inner attention on your reasons & purposes.
None of us will ever move towards something – even the Great Something – without reasons & purposes.

Well-meaning folks can interrupt our move toward Outstanding Energy – by saying stuff like: “Oh I’ve read you’ll never sleep properly once you’ve been a bad sleeper……….” So probably wise not to share too much of Your Goal your Reasons & Purposes at this stage.

Warmly

Sally
Sally Stubbs
‘Cures that Endure’

sally@sally-stubbs.com

A 5 YEAR OLD’S STORY ………….

Monday, March 3rd, 2014

 

Sally Stubbs

Sally Stubbs

Here’s a Story to make us think differently!

Profoundly perhaps?

About our own life – about the problems we deal with, the ‘things’ that cause us to ‘suffer mind – emotional pain’ – such as “I can’t sleep” “I feel so nervous” “I feel so worthless…..” “I worry my self ragged”

I am certain – after 40 over years of study, research, & experience, that, unless we were ill as a child, we were not born with these problems! (And I am not naive! I can’t afford to be!)

So: ‘where did these problems come from???’
Must be our biggest Question now, why now? because, we are well into our next Revolution – the Revolution of Consciousness.

Let’s support one another in Resolving our problems. I believe that in doing our own Work – we can help change & Resolve suffering for others. Maybe by a kind of mysterious Osmosis! Mostly thru’ the Right kind of education YIKES! In the US – children age 2 & 3 are being wrongly diagnosed with Bi Polar!

Looks like I am adopting the wiles of thee Outstanding Story Teller here – by keeping you waiting so you are building your anticipation. Yeah!

Before – I begin the story – let’s briefly recap: Where do these kinds of ‘painful’ problems we are suffering come from?

Simplistically two main ‘places’:

1) As kids we will ignore the needs of our self – to conform to the needs of the adults around us, and or to our culture (I am not talking here about the ‘safe & important boundaries’ that are needed to be taught us – I am talking about the seemingly simple orders given such as: ‘Be quiet – do not speak!’ & our self becomes quiet – when in fact our self had something important to ‘speak up’ Our self – stops ‘speaking up’ & our self feels ‘shunned’ Sometimes our self will get angry at being shunned – And in a vicious cycle we are more shunned.)

2) From the: ‘Awful glare directed at us in a parents eyes’ to ‘unbearable’ abuse which causes our self to ‘hide away’ deep in our consciousness. Or, our self will ‘go live on the streets’.

All of these ‘painful’ experiences, which come ‘into us’ from an unhelpful or ‘destructive’ outer event in our life – can be Resolved. You can be doing this right now, for your self, with ‘drawing out’ your experiences in the Metaphors of your Drawings. Experiences have structure – as you Draw your Metaphors of your experiences – you gain solutions to your inner ‘conflicts’ & the structure of the experience changes.

A 5 Year Olds Story:
It was just before Christmas, seven years ago, I was sitting with a friend, he was age 5. He was snuggled up to me – a log fire crackled in front of us. He asked me if I’d like to hear his stories. Oh Yes!
“OK” he says, sitting upright, I think this is important: “Mark liked to sit on his elbow, and sometimes on an eyelash, and sometimes he liked to sit on the top of his head. Mark liked to stand on his nose, and he liked to stand on his eyebrow. Mark liked to wear his jumper upside down, and he liked to wear his trousers upside down and he liked to wear his shoes back to front. Mark did not like to upset his parents. So then Mark sat on his bottom, and he stood on his feet and he wore his jumper and his trousers and his shoes like everyone else did.”

An acquaintance of mine, a couple of years prior to me hearing the stories, had spent a summer weekend with me & Mark. She whispered conspiratorially to me: ‘Mark is Autistic’

I changed the real name of my 5 year friend – who is now 12 and a Gem of a person.
The Great, Great news is that, tho’ Mark ‘conformed’ he did not lose sense of his self. Why? I am convinced it is because of the Outstanding Intelligence of Mark’s parents. And by Intelligence I mean what the word means, the language of intelligence – interlegere: The ability to read between the lines.

With my love – my gift for you Let the Breeze Blow In – helps you to create a safe space – listen once a day for 10 days or so – it’s very relaxing of mind – and body & lasts only 2o minutes. Listen so you will ‘read between the lines’ of your own experiences. Honour the experiences – the truth: “They were yelling at me – telling me I was stupid. That really hurt….” And a lasting process begins for you of changing the structure of the experience.
I wish you lasting self empowerment in the Right way for you…….

Warmly

Sally
Sally Stubbs
‘Cures that Endure’

sally@sally-stubbs.com