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Posts Tagged ‘happy’

Make 2019 The Year For You!

Monday, November 12th, 2018

free mojoWould you like to be happier in 2019?
Wikipedia quotes: “Happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being characterized by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy”
Could our Happiness possibly be about choice? Of course, because it really is up to us to be happy:)

I believe we do have the choice. I promise you from my ‘Heart’ – although being outstandingly happy 24/7 would be ludicrous – because we do have the challenges, the uncertainties and absolutely we do have the sadness. Yet: we can learn to give straight, focused time to the challenges and the uncertainties and we can accept that it is healthy for our ‘Heart’ to feel sadness.
If we can consider briefly for a few moments – when we were babies and when we were young children – as long as we were well, warm, fed – physically comfortable And we were experiencing emotional stability, we were in a state of mental & emotional contentment – which, when we saw, heard, smelt, tasted, touched on something exciting, beautiful, intriguing, contentment could range to joy.

When we were ‘at one with our world’ and ‘our world was at one with us’ we were content…………..
Today we were going to explore – the ‘how’ to solve, resolve and ‘heal’ our ‘inner’ objections to our Happiness.

I think we need a couple more things in place before we take this step.
I’ll talk about these couple of ‘steps’ in a moment, because resolving our ‘objections’ to Happiness does take effort.

Enjoyable effort actually, because the effort has immeasurable rewards for our life – the reward being that life can be experienced as a stable inner sense of contentment – no matter the challenges and bewilderments in life.

Just to recap:
When you are answering the questions: And when I am happy – how do I know that I am happy? – and you then choose to answer the question through your own knowing – of some past experience – your thoughts and your feelings You then also ‘note’ the inner objections, such as: ‘Yeah but I’m so worrying about…’ ‘Yeah but I’m really stressing about….’  ‘Yeah but – I can’t say “No”…’ ‘Yeah but I can’t sleep…….’
Our inner objections to our Happiness are valid.

Each objection needs our careful attention – to solve resolve, and heal correctly – and permanently.
So before we explore the ‘how’ to do this – let’s spend another week – for a few minutes a day ‘firming up’ our inner ability and resourcefulness to access our thoughts and feelings of Happiness.

Ideally we would do this – access inner happiness for twenty minutes every hour & a half!

If you are the type of person who likes facts go look up my teacher Dr Ernest Rossi on google – Ultradian Rhythms. Natural rhythms in our amazing brain – every hour & a half throughout the 24 hours our brain wants and needs to rest, totally in a state of contentment for 20 minutes. None of us will take this amount of time in our – oh so busy schedules – to rest & feel content within our self – leaving the world to ‘grind on’ with its problems! You can choose to do the 20 minutes Ultradian rest once a day?

Here’s a link for you to my course which need to use for only half an hour a day to make your life happier.
Enjoy:) Enhance Your Happiness

And the other ‘step’ for you this week:

Explore your own beliefs – you can choose to feel happy – it is a choice!

The only times happiness is not a choice are:
1) When our inner objections are not resolved with the right attention.
2) When we are literally in physical danger, when we have to ‘run like mad, or fight’.
3) When we are genuinely grieving the loss of a loved one

Wishing you enjoyment on your ‘steps’ towards your Happiness.
warmly

Sally

sally@sally-stubbs.

www.sally-stubbs.com

Make 2015 an Outstanding Year for You!

Thursday, January 8th, 2015

outstanding energy

Would you like a happier 2015?
Wikipedia quotes: “Happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being characterized by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy”
Could our Happiness possibly be about choice?

I believe we do have the choice. I promise you from my ‘Heart’ – I am not being flippant here. And being outstandingly happy 24/7 would be ludicrous – because we do have the challenges, the uncertainties and absolutely we do have the sadness. Yet: we can learn to give straight, focused time to the challenges and the uncertainties and we can accept that it is healthy for our ‘Heart’ to feel sadness.
If we can consider briefly for a few moments – when we were babies and when we were young children – as long as we were well, warm, fed – physically comfortable And we were experiencing emotional stability, we were in a state of mental & emotional contentment – which, when we saw, heard, smelt, tasted, touched on something exciting, beautiful, intriguing, contentment could range to joy.

When we were ‘at one with our world’ and ‘our world was at one with us’ we were content…………..
Today we were going to explore – the ‘how’ to solve, resolve and ‘heal’ our ‘inner’ objections to our Happiness.

I think we need a couple more things in place before we take this step.
I’ll talk about these couple of ‘steps’ in a moment, because resolving our ‘objections’ to Happiness does take effort.

Enjoyable effort actually, because the effort has immeasurable rewards for our life – the reward being that life can be experienced as a stable inner sense of contentment – no matter the challenges and bewilderments in life.

Just to recap:
When you are answering the questions: And when I am happy – how do I know that I am happy? – and you then choose to answer the question through your own knowing – of some past experience – your thoughts and your feelings You then also ‘note’ the inner objections, such as: ‘Yeah but I’m so worrying about…’ ‘Yeah but I’m really stressing about….’ ‘Yeah but I feel ignored by this person…’ ‘Yeah but – I can’t say “No”…’ ‘Yeah but I can’t sleep…….’
Our inner objections to our Happiness are valid.

Each objection needs our careful attention – to solve resolve, and heal correctly – and permanently.
So before we explore the ‘how’ to do this – let’s spend another week – for a few minutes a day ‘firming up’ our inner ability and resourcefulness to access our thoughts and feelings of Happiness.

Ideally we would do this – access inner happiness for twenty minutes every hour & a half!

If you are the type of person who likes facts go look up my teacher Dr Ernest Rossi on google – Ultradian Rhythms. Natural rhythms in our amazing brain – every hour & a half throughout the 24 hours our brain wants & needs to rest, totally in a state of contentment for 20 minutes. None of us will take this amount of time in our – oh so busy schedules – to rest & feel content within our self – leaving the world to ‘grind on’ with its problems! You can choose to do the 20 minutes Ultradian rest once a day?

Here’s my free gift for you – my 20 minute story for you – to rest and make your life happier.
Enjoy:) Enhance Your Happiness

And the other ‘step’ for you this week:

Explore your own beliefs – you can choose to feel happy – it is a choice!

The only times happiness is not a choice are:
1) When our inner objections are not resolved with the right attention.
2) When we are literally in physical danger, when we have to ‘run like mad, or fight’.
3) When we are genuinely grieving the loss of a loved one

Wishing you enjoyment on your ‘steps’ towards your Happiness.
warmly

Sally

sally@sally-stubbs.com

New Year: New You…………

Wednesday, January 15th, 2014
Sally Stubbs

Sally Stubbs

I truly wish for you a Very Happy, Life fulfilled, New Year……….
I’ve just read this, in the news:
‘One of the biggest untold stories of the week – and year – came right after many people had overindulged for the holidays. Turns out at least 38 million adults drink too much…..’Gosh!
And maybe there’s a report somewhere in the news that millions of us also eat too much!

Really!
And there are millions of us who neither drink too much nor eat too much – rather, millions of us are just unhappy – we use our adult cognitive language to describe these ‘universal’ experiences, of unhappiness, such as ’I am so stressing out’ ‘I am worrying all the time’ ‘others keep walking all over me’ ‘I can never say: No’
Now:

let’s take a few moments to have an intelligent appraisal of what I’ve genuinely wished for you. (Of course my wish is genuine – I mean wouldn’t that be Utopia if all of us were very happy & life fulfilled!)
So:

we’re considering an intelligent appraisal – intelligent meaning: the ability to ‘read between the lines’
I warmly invite you to join me, it’s a simple strategy that will, I promise you, lead you to a real experience of WOW! – and a movement for you towards: A Very Happy, Life fulfilled New Year.
Try it now:

or come back to my letter when you’ve 20 minutes for your self.

.
How you can begin to create for your self the wish I have for you, by taking the first part of my ‘wish’ first:
‘Very Happy’ – Ask your self these non ordinary questions – which will give you the gift of different & unusual answers and a way forward for you: ‘And – when I am happy – how do I know that I am happy?’ Your answers will come to you in either thoughts or feelings, your thoughts, if you stop time & slow down for a few moments, will lead to the feelings, such as: ‘I think about that time when I was….. I can picture the place….. I can even hear some nice sounds……’ ‘As I think about that – my breathing becomes slower & I feel nice warmth in my stomach……’ Stay with these thoughts & feelings for a few moments, and simply begin to really know that you do know that you can be happy, even though you may well be noticing objections from part of your mind, the: ‘Yeah but…..I’m really worried about X – & Y is stressing me……’
The secret here is to acknowledge the objections, say to your self: ‘I’ve noted that, (objection) I will get back to that in a few days time.’
So:Ready, Get Set, Go!

………….take just a few minutes a day and during those minutes gently keep your focus on: ‘And – when I am happy – how do I know that I am happy?’ Develop the thoughts & the feelings that you have that are ‘happy’– And keep on ‘telling’ the objections that you will give attention to it/them – in a few days time. I will be exploring with you – how – to safely & comfortably do this next time.

Warmest wishes

Sally

10 Top Tips To Get Happy Now!

Thursday, March 7th, 2013

Be Happy1. Choose to Change:-     What stops us being happy, no matter what is happening in our life, are our ‘inner’ thoughts and beliefs.

2. Consider a Formula for Change:-    Every hour and a half throughout your day, pause for a few seconds and say, “I can change my thoughts and beliefs which do not celebrate my life”. The brain is in rest phase and the mind is ready to learn something new.

3.  Identify Your Desired State:-     Take time and write down your goal, your desired state. Focus throughout the day and plan your most important journey of your life – to happiness.

4.  Keep A Notebook:-    Carry your notebook and make lists – be ready to write down anything that will make you happier.

5.  Remind Yourself Why You Need Change:-    Get fully motivated towards reaching your destination. Imagine yourself with a serene or smiley face: hear your voice, strong, certain or calmn and notice the change.

6.  Keep Your Saboteurs In Check:-    Say your Mum had been a constant worrier – consistantly scared for your safety and wellbeing. Chronic worrying is a waste of time and life. You can say to yourself “I am going to have clear thoughts with loads of energy for my brain to respond with new and happier thought patterns.”

7.  Reflect:-    Take time to reflect on your percetions and response and discover you have the choice to change your peceptions and therefore your responses. Your mind and brain can now begin to have safe responses rather than her habituated fear responses.

8.  Pay Attention To Your Thoughts:-    Interrupt your patterns of ‘down’ thinking. So do something fast, really different like splashing your face with cold water and you will train yourself to interrupt your negative thought patterns.

9.  Find Your Space:-    Choose a time every day  say 15 – 20 minutes for time and space just for you. Choose to think things that make you feel good. You will soon discover that it is entirely up to you. You will then see how you will begin to feel ‘up’ and happier for longer and longer periods of time.

10.  Smile Every Day:-    Smiling instantly lifts your mood: If Life Gives You Lemons – How 10 Seconds a Day Will Bring You Happiness.

 

Enjoy my top tips: comments welcome sally@sally-stubbs.com

Sally

sally-stubbs.com

www.rapha-hypnosis.com

 

 

 

FOOD FOR THOUGHT!

Monday, July 9th, 2012

Sally Stubbs

Well, one of the four basic things that you and I have in common and that you and I absolutely need are: air, water, food and we also need emotional stability.
Emotional stability we can talk about for a long, long time. So today let’s talk about food!
I love food – ain’t food great! I also have a really great relationship with food, and with my body, maintaining a stable happy weight for me for nearly thirty years.

HOW IS THE PROPENSITY TO EATING ‘BAD’ FOOD PSYCHOLOGICAL?
We can go to the gym, we sweat, we’re full on motivated during our workout, determined to burn off some the fat. Then, after all this effort and feeling virtuous, we head home and eat every biscuit in sight! Reward! Biscuits were a reward for many of us in childhood!
We are worried, stressed or upset so we grab several bars of chocolate. We do this because when we were a child and fretful we were likely to be comforted by our parents with something sweet. We believe sweet stuff gives us comfort!
Neuro science tells us that our brains are genetically hard wired to seek emotional security, particularly from affection. As very young infants, one of the important times, for some of us, that we received affection or closeness was when our mother, or father, grandparent held us close and fed us. So, for some, our minds will carry the connection between food and affection or love. Emotional stability!
Our minds and brains store our perceptions and our responses, and so we learn from those early years to associate reward and comfort and emotional closeness with these types of food. These early life patterns of behaviour prevail.
Because of this, it takes psychological and emotional effort to defy our fat and sugar cravings.
As we are growing up through childhood, teens and into adulthood, and we are dealing with worries and problems we discover that fatty foods have a heavy quality to them, after eating these types of foods we feel sluggish and drowsy for a while, and we stop thinking. When we stop thinking we stop worrying and stressing. As a result we learn to believe that fatty foods will ease our worries!
CAN OTHER FACTORS COME INTO IT AS WELL?
Fat has more than twice the calories than any other nutrient. Calories are units of energy, and nature does not like skinny, nature sees fat as a friend!
Why?
If we briefly consider our history; several million years ago we humans had small brains, about the size of a chimpanzees. As we developed our skills our brains grew, and our stomachs shrank, but we still needed los of energy (calories) to run, we were hunters. Where did we get our energy to run? From fat.
Research has shown us that Aboriginal hunters eat the fat from the kill first. In our modern society we no longer need to run to live and survive, but nature is still keen on fat.
We can also consider that so many of us can feel stressed in our modern fast paced lives.
Fatty foods stimulate dopamine and nor-adrenalin, this chemical cocktail gives us the feeling of a ‘happy rush’, and we use this feeling as an unsuccessful attempt to resolve our stress.
Now we can find ourselves in a vicious cycle, the greater amounts of fat we eat the more our brain will produce a protein called galanin. What happens next? We’ve really got a problem, because galanin cause us to crave fat.
Sugar increases tryptophan which our body uses to make serotonin. Serotonin is the wonderful chemical which assists us to feel (temporarily!) in an ‘up’ state, more able to cope with stress and unhappiness.
Also, when we are experiencing long periods of stress in life we are producing a massive amount of unused adrenaline; we can then go into adrenal fatigue. This fatigue causes a sugar craving.
HOW CAN WE OVERCOME THIS?
We can realise what a fantastic job our ancient ancestors did for us, they got the energy they needed from fats, they ran, they survived. We are here today because of it, how great is that.
We can understand that the sculptor of our brain and mind is our environment. Our brain and mind depend critically on their wiring and growth from our experiences in our earlier life. The great news is, our brain and mind have the remarkable ability to adapt and to rewire.
How do we do this?
We can know that the fundamental truth about stress is that it comes from our personal perceptions, and our internal communication about an event or situation and our experience. We can choose to change both our perceptions and our internal communication.
I’ll give you a very simple example of what I’m talking about.
Our partner is late getting home. We can have a myriad of perceptions such as:
They are working hard and being really conscientious and loyal to their business.
We communicate internally with a dialogue of pride and make everything cosy and welcoming for them to arrive home.
Or: They have been in an accident. Our internal communications can cripple us with horror and dread. We make images of them lying in a pool of blood. We don’t know what to do, maybe phone their work – phone the hospitals.
Or: They are having an affair. Our internal communication makes those sexy images; we are frozen with fury, or slumped with loss and abandonment.

TIPS TO STOP WORRYING OR STRESSING:
• First we need to really consider and accept that the ‘happy rush’ we’ve been getting from these ‘bad’ foods is temporary and will never resolve our problems. Next:
• Make a decision to change your perceptions, the ones that are not serving you or celebrating your life.
• Start by slowing time in your mind just a little, you can do this by simply telling yourself: Slow down. This is so that you can observe your own unconscious perceptions of any situation that has been worrying or stressing you. Just be observant to begin with.
• Have a note book and write down a list of your worries or stresses. This is relevent because we can often begin to feel overwhelmed by worry, as if we have thousands of worries. Once we begin to separate them out, we usually discover we have only three or six or seven.
• If you have more than one worry, take each at a time separately and begin to objectively ask: what can I do about this ‘one’? And when you go to bed at night ask your dreams to comfortably give you solutions to this ‘one’. One of the main purposes of our dreams is to give us solutions that we have not even thought of before.
My dream is that we will all live happily in our own skin. And I know we can! Let’s get on with it hey. If you know someone who is struggling in their relationship with food please, please tell them about my course/treatment on CD’s and MP 3 download: Don’t Wait to Be the Right Weight
I never once use the word ‘diet’ on my course. I hope I have illustrated today why diets do not work!
Thinking of you warmly
Sally

sally@sally-stubbs.com

EPISTEMOLOGICAL EXERCISE?

Tuesday, July 3rd, 2012

Sally Stubbs

Hi Everyone
As our Dear David Groves used to say after every lecture and as we filed out the class room – to go get our coffee and cakes!!: “Metaphors Be with You…..” in his best Star Trekky voice!!!
I ‘took’ to David’s Work like the proverbial ‘Duck to water’ – which I can verify as each spring time, this year, every year, that we’ve been lucky to live by ‘our’ river, we watch, with soppy type sentimental grins on our faces, the teeny weeny fluffy baby ducklings take to the water of the River Greta flowing merrily past our back door.
I mean we’ve heard a rumour that Greta is one of the fastest flowing rivers in the UK – some may dispute the rumour! But hey, the water is fast and there are these little groups of minute ducklings confidently making their way in the full force……. Awesome!
It was, is, like that for me with Metaphors and David’s genius Work. Awesome!
Sometimes our conscious mind wants to make sense of the Epistemological Metaphors.
So let’s just remember for a few moments Stella. She did not say she wanted her skin to be clear of Psoriasis – (which did happen within a few weeks of her Work with me….) she said she wanted to stop feeling almost utterly helpless and she wanted to feel strong.
Epistemology did this for her! This is what is awesome for us to reflect upon. We as unique individuals know how we know the truth of our own thoughts and feelings of an experience, and therefore we as individuals know how to discover the solutions and resolutions to our psychological and emotional problems.
Epistemology is the branch of philosophy that serves to answer the question: How do you know what you know?
I asked Stella: “And when you don’t feel strong and you feel almost utterly helpless, how do you know you don’t feel strong and you feel almost utterly helpless?
Stella’s unique knowing was like a heavy feeling in the whole of her chest, and from her knowing, with clean language, we developed the metaphor of a bee, and her 13 year old self, trapped in a heavy metal cage, from which there was a glimpse of some lovely hills in the distance.
Let’s just briefly consider the wonder of Stella’s Epistemological Metaphors.
The ‘bee’ showed her the way to her freedom to – BE – herself, to ‘move on and journey’ through her life to BE – OK – to know where to go, with strength and loveliness to ‘weather the storms’ (the lovely hills!) Awesome isn’t it!!!
My audio treatments/courses Work with generalised metaphors – in such a way as every unique individual mind will respond with the metaphors of the stories that I’ve written and recorded for you, in the right way for each persons needs. And that’s awesome too!!!
Here is something that you can do to gain your own WOW moments of how you know what you know, safely.
Ask the Epistemological question!!
Don’t ask the Epistemological question of your own needs, for now; ask the question of a few friends or family. Make it a simple question, your friend or family member will feel comfortable I promise.
Ask of four different people: (start with the word And*, only if YOU feel comfortable): “And, when you feel unhappy, how do you know that you feel unhappy?”
If you feel that asking this particular question is too invasive of your friends privacy – then simply, instead of asking: How do you know that you feel UNHAPPY – Ask: “How do you know that you feel HAPPY when you feel HAPPY?”
You will receive as many entirely different answers as the entirely different number of people you ask the question…..
And this is why Therapy cannot have suppositions, presuppositions, analysis and so on……….. about any individual’s problem.

• *“And” is a Clean Language conduit. It provides a natural bridge between the question and where the person’s information is sourced.
• “And” also allows two experiences to co-exist. (e.g. I loved my mum AND I hated the way she … )
Oh and please do let me know what you think about our new site www.rapha-hypnosis.com you will be most welcomed. Thank you

Thinking of you warmly
Sally

www.sally-stubbs.com

My personal and private e mail: sally@sally-stubbs.com