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Posts Tagged ‘self’

Finding Your ‘Mojo’

Monday, March 14th, 2016


When we have our MoJo’ with us we can feel we have a connection with an innate kind of ‘magic’ within us.

Children have it! Just watch them play:)

As long as we, as children are fed, comfortable, safe and emotionally secure we are ‘magical’ and creative – we explore the immeasurable potential of our consciousness.

We have a healthy flow between our conscious and unconscious ‘worlds’.

A child who is comfortable, safe and emotionally secure will create a palace from stones in the garden, a space station from a cardboard box!

Let us consider, first things first: Finding your MoJo?

What do we mean by ‘Your MoJo’?

Your Identity? – Your Uniqueness? – Your Self?

Call it what you will – ‘Your MoJo’ or, as a Client recently excitedly said to me: “My Magic Wand”- and another Client beautifully said: “My Intended Being.”

Use whatever name/metaphor ‘sits’ and resonates with You. I will call it MoJo in this article.

Here’s what having your ‘MoJo’ present and available to you will be like, so, please read these next sentences slowly – and the ‘key’ for you beginning to find your ‘MoJo’ will be how you respond to these sentences, in your thoughts and feelings:

Do what you want:  Anything good is achievable:  Achieve abundance and manifest happiness in your life:  Celebrate life. Start being honest with yourself:

Stop talking about other people! 

On first reading we’ll probably think: ‘Absolutely I will!’

On second or third – slow – deliberate reading – we’ll likely notice the objections coming up – as thoughts, such as: “I’m not good enough!” “I’ve tried and failed already” “Nothing works out for me!” I can’t!

These negative internal voices are one of the most important ways that we ‘lose touch’ with our ‘MoJo’.

Our ‘MoJo’ gets buried under the ‘objecting’ inner chatter in our minds.

Most of us do it!

In fact around 99% of us!!

And some of this ‘objecting’ blocking our way to happiness and celebration of our life is unconscious – we often don’t even ‘hear’ the continuous chatter – although for sure we feel the result.

We feel it in our body the churning stomach, the heaviness and tightness in our chest, pounding in our heart, a lump in our throat – and suddenly we are ‘blocked’ we are ‘stuck’ in fear. We don’t speak up, we don’t go and talk to the lovely person at a party, we don’t apply for the great job. We don’t explore, we lose our curiosity we are ‘blocked’ by fear. Our ‘MoJo’ is half ‘buried’ under the negative inner mind chatter, which plays on and on and on, bullying us.

Let’s think for a moment how we feel when we are bullied? Bullied by ‘big people’ – parents, (mostly bullying parents have good intention for us) at school maybe, – peers – people on trains and planes, people in the street! When we are not in a position to ‘stand our ground’ and retaliate, we feel ‘crushed’ – hurt, in ‘pain’ – it’s awful.

Similarly our relentless inner bullying voices ‘crush’ our self!

Polishing Our Mojo!

Do what you want, anything good is achievable, achieve abundance and manifest happiness in your life. Celebrate life. Start being honest with yourself. Stop talking about other people! 

How do we begin to achieve this state of happiness within our selves – and with others?

We begin by permanently silencing the relentless inner negative mind chatter! This is one of the most empowering things we need to do for our self. Our ‘MoJo’ will begin to become fully present, we will not become obnoxious! and we will also be safe.

There is some Great research: young children who are emotionally safe and secure are not obnoxious! They share, they are kind and generous in a healthy way.

Further important research: Positive affirmations, positive thinking, positive suggestions, relaxations, deep breathing exercises do not authentically and lastingly resolve and stop the negative inner mind chatter.

If we think of the negative inner mind chatter as being like horrid damp patches on the inside walls of our home, all the above strategies are just painting over the damp. It will feel good, refreshed and comfortable – for a few hours! Then a friend comes along and says: “Hey let’s go and do this….” And up comes the ‘damp’ – the “I can’t” “I’m not good enough” “I’m too nervous, scared……”

Thoroughly fixing the ‘damp’ takes some time – time that will be oh so rewarding and self-empowering. It’s like we need to take a journey to trace the ‘damp’ – ladders out, get onto the roof, find the broken roof tiles and remove and replace them! The new replaced tiles will last a century!

To make this an easy, enjoyable journey for you I have made these short videos – with my ‘Top Tools’ for you to find and free your ‘MoJo’ empower your self and truly achieve and manifest happiness in your life.

My top tips videos are all on youtube –  here is the link:

Warmest wishes




Monday, August 18th, 2014




‘Funny old word’ – selfish!

The Dictionary definition: Self-centered, self-seeing, self-interested……

Then there’s a load of definitions about being egotistical. That complicates things for us – we’ll be condemned for being egotistical!

‘Selfish’ – A trader at Billingsgate London fish market!!!

The Oxford English Dictionary says the origin of the word ”selfish” begins in 1640 when a
Presbyterian archbishop coined the phrase from ”his own mint”

Seems there was no such word before 17th Century England! Makes you really think doesn’t it!

“O wad some Power the giftie gie us To see oursels as ithers see us!” Robert Burns – Scottish Poet.
I’ll have the impudence to say: “Hi, Robert, as long as those eyes seeing ‘oursels’ – see the Beauty” (Discuss!)

I like the dictionary definition bit: self-seeing.

There’s a really Great Question here:
How do we see our self?
How do you see your self?

Because a problem arises – if we truly see the Beauty of our self – we’re self-ish – and that’s bad! It, so we’ve been taught – perhaps since the 17th Century – precludes us being caring, sharing, altruistic. We have to pretty much shun seeing the Beauty of our self.

What happens inside your self when I say to you right now:

You are Beautiful.

I can ask you to pause, can I not, and read my true statement slowly – very slowly – notice with the great sensitivity I know you have – your inner self responses to:

You are Beautiful.

Maybe ask a friend to say it, congruently of course, to you – You are Beautiful……….

Notice your objections??? Notice your Resistance???

Any Objection & Resistance to this statement of Truth about your self – comes from the ‘fragment’ of your self ‘who’ went into hiding.

This ‘fragment’ of self does not believe in ‘its’ Beauty.

This ‘fragment’ of self is the ‘owner’ of present day symptoms – the fears, the nervousness, the not sleeping, the stressing the worrying………….. The feeling like a ‘door mat’, the feeling unacceptable – not good enough – not appreciated – not being able to congruently say: “NO!” to food, to certain people, the feeling angry –

Don’t try and ‘get rid of’ the symptoms. Let the symptoms assist & guide you to ‘find’ Free & Heal your hiding ‘fragment’ of your self. And then – the symptoms will be Permanently Resolved!

I’m here to help – that’s what I do – go have a look at what I do – AND what I’ve perfected during the past 30 years – I am a Veracious Guardian – Freeing & Healing the lost ‘fragments’ of self.





Monday, August 11th, 2014

Catbells in FebruaryI have a truly Authentic feeling that this particular letter to you – is Wow! Awesome!

A lovely young man contacted me recently – questioning one of my letters – saying:

“I don’t know how to find my self!  It’s hiding!”

Indeed the lovely young man was right – one of our protective mechanisms when we’ve had a few “Ouches!” that hurt – and the “OUCHES!!” like a sum – add up and get big and more painful – our self will go into ‘hiding’.

I’ll just generalize here – so what I’m about to say may not resonate fully with you – as of course we are all Unique. I’ll generalize by calling the important fragment of our self that goes into hiding as a protection from more “Ouches!!” is our ‘sensitive self’.
Absolutely our ‘sensitive’ self wants and needs to withdraw and go into hiding – However – the point is – that eventually – or sooner or later – our ‘sensitive’ self has a kind of ambiguity about hiding away. Our ‘sensitive’ self wants to stay there in hiding – it’s safer here – and it also wants to be found & freed – to live life. Yet it is fearful to be Free – it may get loads more “Ouches!!”

The ambiguity causes our ‘sensitive’ self to produce our symptoms – such as our ‘Ground Hog Day’ – nervousness, our worrying, our not saying “NO!!” to people, to food – our not sleeping – our anxiety – our stressing……..
In the ‘hiding place’ time moves in a circle – time is ‘stuck’ hence the replaying day after day of the same old same old symptoms.

OF COURSE YOU WANT RID OF THE SYMPTOMS – they’re ruining your life!

But the Symptoms will not be banished – they will Permanently Resolve – once we discover our ‘self’ who is hiding away – and free our self to be our self!
Our Symptoms – will safely and comfortably guide and lead us on a journey of discovery – to find and discover our hiding or lost self.

And – that is exactly what my Work does – on CD & MP3 -and flash drive. Half an hour a day for 40 days.

As Gary keeps on saying “It’s a fun journey” It’s unlike any other Therapeutic Work – it does not ‘get rid of symptoms’ – The Symptoms Permanently Resolve when we find heal & free our hiding or lost self – and in doing so we reclaim:
our Amazing Mo-Jo……………..



The Loss of Several Cows!

Monday, March 10th, 2014
outstanding energy


How about going for this statement:

We will get our selves – plenty of Outstanding Energy – & move forwards to Successfully achieving our Goal!
We can & we will do this – & – I’m Wondering if – You will agree with me! I can – ask this of us – can I not!

I can ask – & then together – as you will agree – with me – we can begin to Explore the how we can achieve Outstanding Energy to Successfully Achieve Our own Goal.

Yeah – the absolutely all important HOW. We can all say stuff like: I really, really, really, really want to – Fix my computer! Build an amazing house…….. Bake a delicious cake…….. Anything………… (Here’s a rare ‘but’ from me!) But – for all things that we want to ‘fix ‘we need to know how!

(I wrote a Great Book – & called it “The ‘Soul’ Fixer” – the how to fix the ‘Soul’ or ‘Spirit’ or ‘Self’ – (another ‘but’!) But – the ‘Soul’, ‘Spirit’, ‘Self’ doesn’t actually need ‘fixing’; IT didn’t get ‘broken’ – IT – (let’s say for now) ‘went into hiding’ Which is a whole other subject for us another time. Any way my Book is now called:


So, let’s say: We really, really, really, really want to change our thoughts our feelings & our negative invalidating beliefs.

My chosen subject for nearly 40 years has been – the how to do this – to live life problem free – free to be content, happy, free to be – our self – free to support & cherish others – accept our ‘down’ – sad days – have a bit of a ‘grumpy’ day – and continue to grow in our own happiness.

We’re talking here about what I’ll call – simple symptoms’ – which to you & to others aren’t simple – they’re debilitating. They can be seriously awful – I know it – I’ve been there – such as: I can’t say NO! – I’m stressed – I’m worried witless – I can’t sleep – I’m anxious – I’m worthless – I’m so fearful……….. people don’t ‘get me’………. People hate me…………… I’m so lonely………………..

We’re not insane! Though I know the endless mind-emotional ‘Ground Hog Day’ – (same ‘damn’ thing over & over again…… same old negative unwelcome thoughts – same old stomach churning – same old feeling worthless – same old saying ‘yes’ instead of a true No……..) – can make us feel like we’re going crazy. We got ‘Frayed at our Edges’ during all kinds of experiences in life.

In the mid eighteen hundreds – the pioneers were doing their best to treat ‘mind’ problems. They developed a multiplicity of diagnoses. In the old books causes of ‘mind problems’ were divided into two main categories. The first category being called Moral; this included diagnosis such as: ‘loss of several cows’ and ‘getting over excited at the Great Exhibition!’

Valiant attempts were made to treat many of these ‘mind problems’ in buildings called Asylums – from the Latin ‘A’ meaning NO – & ‘sylum’ meaning CURE.

Places of No Cure. My Heart Aches……….

I am only interested in Cure – Permanent Cure of our: I can’t say NO! – I’m stressed – I’m worried witless – I can’t sleep – I’m anxious – I’m worthless – I’m so fearful……….. people don’t ‘get me’………. People hate me…………… I’m so lonely………………..

The How:
Maybe you have been drawing and Working with your Metaphors these past couple of weeks?
Maybe you said what most of us are prone to say: ‘Yeah – all right – when I’ve time” or “Sally’s crazy!” (Yeah – well I do revel in my respite times in Bonkerdom – I visit there most days!)

So – let’s ‘back track’ with the how:
Start by giving your Goal attention for a few minutes a day for the coming week. Write it down chew your pen – hone your Goal.

If you’ve got several Goals like: I want to sleep well – I want to feel confident – I want to say NO and mean NO! Take one Goal at a time.

Start to draft your Goal in the positive. Like this (let’s take sleep as an example); instead of stating I want to stop tossing & turning at night; I want to stop waking at 3 or 4pm most mornings – State: I want to sleep well throughout the night.

The next how:
Over the next few days – a few minutes every day, write a list of your reasons & purposes to achieve your goal.

You might reasonably be thinking, it’s obvious, I want to sleep well!
But add the why component to the mix:
• I’m drowsy through the day but don’t sleep well at night!
• I seem to just get off to sleep and my alarm goes off
• My work isn’t up to scratch because I’m tired all the time
• I want enough energy for work and fun
These are my examples, be sure to list your own specific reasons and purposes.

Reasons are mostly about logic and purposes are mostly about ‘passions’. You’ll have loads on your list once


Here’s my gift to you with my love – Let the Breeze Blow In.
Listen to it every day for the coming days – and as you listen: once you begin to feel that you are ‘in the zone’ with my voice guiding you – ignore my voice – and focus your inner attention on your reasons & purposes.
None of us will ever move towards something – even the Great Something – without reasons & purposes.

Well-meaning folks can interrupt our move toward Outstanding Energy – by saying stuff like: “Oh I’ve read you’ll never sleep properly once you’ve been a bad sleeper……….” So probably wise not to share too much of Your Goal your Reasons & Purposes at this stage.


Sally Stubbs
‘Cures that Endure’